You are not alone when you wonder if you will ever truly find “the one”.  If you are single or even with someone you are not sure about, it can become a challenge to keep your hopes up to find the ultimate one.  The love of your life.

Many women go on date after date after date.  None create that gut wrenching chemistry and spark and after a while you feel like nothing will pan out.  What women don’t realize is that sometimes their own narrow outlook on life is holding them back, even if they do have their eyes peeled for finding the love of their lives.  It may be, that your heart is not entirely open for new love.   If you are still looking then work on your outlook.  With a positive outlook you have the power to ready yourself so that when the right person does cross your path you’ll be ready for them.

Even if there are no instant sparks, give your Date a chance

One of the ways in which your heart may be hurting you, is that you expect to be absolutely hit over the head with absolute sparks and chemistry.  When you don’t feel it, you fear that the date is a total waste of your time and you get discouraged.  Common dating advice recommends that you consider your date as a potential friend first and fore most.  Instead of casting them off, be open to a friendship.  The point is that you may not have first sight chemistry but if you like the person it could transform into chemistry down the line.  In addition to that, if you are more open to making friendships and expanding your horizons it may lead you to the one.

Don’t focus too much on Qualifications

Women tend to get an idea in their head as to the exact qualifications of the man of their dreams.  They have a resume running in their head.  He has to be 6 feet tall, athletic and toned, a large head of hair, and financially stable.  The problem with focusing on the resume of that person is that you can rule them out as having long-term potential before even getting to know them.  Don’t obsess about the resume of your date.  If he is not as tall as your cutoff or not as rich as your dream man then just go back to taking it one step at a time.  Going on dates is not a marriage proposal.  Focus on the moment and whether you enjoy this persons company.  If you simply feel comfortable around them you have a good start.

Don’t assume Everyone good is Taken

If you have defeatest attitude that all of the good guys are already snatched up by women then you won’t get very far.  If you make the assumption that all of the good men are taken then you might miss someone that is right close to home.  There are plenty of singles out there whether you believe it or not. As they say you are often looking for the fairy tail romance.  That man who is going to storm in on the white horse and sweep you off your feet in love just like in the romance novels.

Focusing on the type of fantasies that are for the movies and romance novels can cause you to sometimes overlook someone that has potential right in your own back yard.  Keep your mind open to the local guys because the love of your life could be right under your nose already.  Sometimes you have such high expectations that you over look and pass over a potential love interest. 

Over sight can also happen when you are still hung up over a previous boyfriend or relationship.  They always say that in order to move on and find someone new you have to give yourself the appropriate time to be completely over your past relationship.  Some women are lucky enough to find love in a stroke of luck meeting with a man.  Others have to process past relationships and baggage and have their house totally in order before their mind really opens up to finding and accepting a new partner.

Don’t get Downed by the dating Competition

If you are trying something like internet dating, it is easy to being to feel down on yourself as the competition for finding love can be truly over whelming.  You might start to blame yourself for not being able to find anyone.  Thinking that you are not young enough, financially stable enough, and beautiful enough can be disheartening.  If you to look at all the women in your age bracket competing with you to find love in your city you would get overwhelmed and probably depressed about the search.

It’s easy to start blaming yourself and get down about your ever being a woman that will meet someone.   If this happens to you then you just have to remember that all it takes is meeting one special person.  At any point in time your life can change, almost instantly.  You really are just one person away from being with someone.  Instead of dwelling on a down dating spell, work on improving yourself so that when you do cross paths with someone you will be receptive and available. 

If you are feeling over whelmed by the competition, try and change your venue to see how that feels.  For example, if you are trying internet dating and feel lost in the sea of profiles then maybe give it a rest and focus on getting out and about more in your own community.   Conversely if you can’t meet anyone in your neighborhood try connecting with online dating or the social networking sites. 

Stories of women re-connecting with high school sweethearts are more common than you think.  Your prom date or friends from years back may still be single and it never hurts to touch base online through internet dating sites, social networking sites such as facebook, or online interest groups like meetup.

You have to get out of your house and do things you enjoy.  Try to socialize, join interest groups, get to the gym, entertainment events such as sports or concerts, and make new friends.  Any social connection that you exercise could lead you inadvertently to a potential partner.  So if you get depressed in one dating domian, give it a rest and open yourself up to some different and new opportunities for a while.

If you are dissatisfied with your love life then complaining about it won’t do you any good.  You have to stop making excuses, decide what you are looking for in a partner, and then get out there and create some real velocity to meet people through new activities and also the internet.   Let go of seeking absolute perfection in a man and open yourself up to new possibilities.  Mr Perfect may not exist as everyone has their quirks and personality differences.  Work on developing the real you so that your personality shines and you can attract the right person into you life.

Lift your spirits with inspirational self help books or consult a psychic

If you feel yourself losing faith that you will find the one, then it always helps to look at some self-help books.  Such reading material can teach you how to better yourself and your attitude, learn to love and allow yourself to be loved in return.  You can also consider consulting a psychic about your love life.  Such meetings could give you more hope and lift your spirits.  With a better attitude in hand you will be well on your way to finding the one!